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Through a Guest's Eyes

Through a Guest’s Eyes

August 26, 2007

Text: 3 John 5-8 

3 John 5-11 

Dear friend, you are being faithful to God when you care for the traveling teachers who pass through, even though they are strangers to you. 6 They have told the church here of your loving friendship. Please continue providing for such teachers in a manner that pleases God. 7 For they are traveling for the Lord, and they accept nothing from people who are not believers. 8 So we ourselves should support them so that we can be their partners as they teach the truth. 

9 I wrote to the church about this, but Diotrephes, who loves to be the leader, refuses to have anything to do with us. 10 When I come, I will report some of the things he is doing and the evil accusations he is making against us. Not only does he refuse to welcome the traveling teachers, he also tells others not to help them. And when they do help, he puts them out of the church. 

11 Dear friend, don't let this bad example influence you. Follow only what is good. Remember that those who do good prove that they are God's children, and those who do evil prove that they do not know God.

NLT 
 

According to a study done in 1999 by the Win Arn group (Homiletics, 5/30/99), visitors look for five characteristics in a church: 

____ The church building. [inviting, accessible, well-maintained] 

____ The adult program. [variety of involvement opportunities] 

____ The character of the worship service. [passion, grace-filled, uplifting] 

____ The friendliness and warmth of the people. [do visitors discover warmth/friendliness as they enter the church, and before/after worship] 

____ A place for children. [needs of children taken seriously] 

Look at that list. I invite you to take a moment to rank them on a scale from one to five. Which do you think was the most important thing that guests look for in a church? Put a 1 beside it. Then what’s the 2^nd most important, and so on. 

How many of you guessed that friendliness would be the number one? I was a little surprised myself, but I guess I shouldn’t have been. 

In our monthly Get Acquainted meetings when guests and new members come to learn more about our church, one of the questions we ask is “What do you like about Concord Trinity?” The most popular response we hear is, “Everyone is so friendly here!” 

As a pastor, I can’t tell you how good that makes me feel! When a congregation reflects warmth and friendliness, it means they’ve seen Christ here, and they reflect that with such an attitude. How can you be friendly to others if you don’t have “joy, joy, joy, joy down in” your heart?  

BUT…this doesn’t mean that friendliness doesn’t take work to cultivate, and it doesn’t mean we can’t keep on improving in this area. 

Because of this, I want to let you in on a well-kept secret.

We’ve hidden high-tech surveillance cameras all over this church. We have them in the ceiling of this sanctuary. Look up—see them? We hide them pretty well, don’t we? 

A group of people constantly review videotape from these cameras, looking for any unfriendly words and actions. 

We caught one such instance recently. You’re about to see it. Now, because the cameras are far away, the image and audio may not be too clear, but I think you’ll get the point. 

When our surveillance group showed this to me, I was shocked.

But, I guess I shouldn’t have been. Did you know that from the beginning of the church, there’s always been a temptation to “guard the pew,” so to speak. 

In today’s scripture, John talks about how important it is to be kind, open, giving to the “travelers” who visit a church. Just after he says this, he mentions a character named Diotrephes.   

Remember what he said about him? 

Diotrephes loves to be the leader. [He] refuses to have anything to do with us…Not only does he refuse to welcome the traveling teachers [visitors], he also tells others not to help them. And when they do help, he puts them out of the church. 

He “loves to be the leader.” He uses the church so that he—not Christ—can be the center of attention. He uses the fellowship to get his needs met. He makes sure those he associates with are those who agree with him. He makes sure those who don’t agree with him never make it into the inner circle of decision-making. And if he gets his way, he’ll kick out those “other” people. 

Yes, from the very beginning the church has had people who will say, “Pardon me, but you’re in my pew.” 

Sort of an exaggeration, but sort of a natural reaction. 

Let’s be honest. As we settle into a church family, isn’t it tempting to be a little like Diotrephes? We get accustomed to worship, programs, and people. We know what we like and who we’re most comfortable with. As we settle into a church, there’s a natural tendency to draw inward, and sometimes forget what it feels like to be a guest. 

Well, don’t worry. Just as we have surveillance cameras to monitor unfriendly behavior, so also do we have a group called the FTF—“Friendliness Training Force.”  

This is a group of people who always remember what it feels like to be a guest in our church. It’s a secret group, and they prefer to stay that way. Only one of them allowed me to take her picture. 

And when this group sees someone on the video saying, “This is my pew,” they lovingly call that person during the week and meet with her/him. 

When they meet, they help them feel what it’s like to walk in here fresh from the outside. They’ll help them look at all aspects of our church’s life through a guest’s eyes. 

Here is an inside look at the type of training they’ll give the person.

They’ll say, “Imagine what it’s like to sit down in the pew for the first time…”  

They’ll say, “Imagine what it’s like to enter the parlor for the first time…” [You ask where a SS class is for your kids, and someone looks it up—it’s in room 203…] 

The FTF will say to the Pink Lady, “Imagine what it’s like to go to a potluck dinner for the first time…”  

Yes, the Friendliness Training Force does do extensive training whenever they spot a Pink Lady. And because their training is so good, do you know what happens at the end of it? The church member’s eyes—and more importantly, heart—are opened. The church member recalls how strange things can appear to a visitor, entering a strange place with strange people. He/she experiences how lonely it can be if people aren’t sensitive to how it feels to come here for the first time—any hurt or loneliness they bring in from the outside can be multiplied if they don’t find warmth the very first Sunday. 

But it’s not just sensitivity to the guest that a member who goes through FTF training experiences. A member discovers that a wonderfully powerful expression of Christ’s love is setting aside your needs on a Sunday morning and reaching out to a guest. Diotrephes put his needs first—get his needs met by being a church insider. But when you put aside your needs in church, to meet the needs of the guest—you are reflecting the face of Christ to that person: and what a beautiful face that is! 

I am happy to say that the FTF has a 100% success rate. They can open the eyes and hearts of anybody, helping them experience how it feels to come in from the outside. They can show them the little but powerful things they can do to make our guests feel like they’re very, very important. 

Just look at what happened to our Pink Lady. After her training, she was asked to help staff the Welcome Center one Sunday morning. Our surveillance camera in the Parlor—that big room at the end of the hall—picked up this scene. 

Amazing! She could have continued talking with her friends at the Center, but she didn’t. She talked with the visiting family, got to know them. She could have just given them directions to the Sunday School rooms for their kids, but she didn’t—she took them there herself. 

Yes, the Pink Lady discovered the joy of being what John called a “loving friend” to the ones walking through our door for the first time. 

Well, I guess I stretched the truth just a little in today’s sermon.

There are no surveillance cameras monitoring our activities.

But, come to think of it, there is One who does look down from above. 

And there is no FTF. Although we do have a wonderful Outreach Team, who created the videos you saw. [Special thanks to Suzanne McKowen for being the Pink Lady, and for Dave Bishop for holding the portable surveillance camera!] 

Wait a second. Maybe we do have an FTF. Maybe we do have a group of people who are sensitive to the needs of our guests, who have been able to look through their eyes, feel what they feel, and help them feel at home. Maybe we do have folks who delight in going beyond their own needs to meet the needs of such visitors. 

Maybe we do have such a group. 

Maybe I’m looking at them.